Indy

This morning we hit the neighborhood garage sale in the subdivision across from us. We were pretty successful. I got Noah a giant tent/tunnel thing that can fold up in a little bag (it's really quite amazing if you can remember how to do it) for $5...and a small little tikes basketball hoop for $4...and some other little things. It was, as always, fun to get out and hunt for treasure!

Later, Noah and I headed to Indy to see my step-sister and her family and my stepmom's sister. (We are all pretty close and like to visit when the opportunity arises). Noah's cousins who are 6 and 4 kept him entertained through the day and he loved playing with them (and their fun toys). After dinner, my dad came back with me, while Kat stayed there...they ran out of space for my dad. He and I are hanging out tonight and Kat will swing by to get him on her way home tomorrow.

It was a good, but busy day. Off to rest for tomorrow! Peace!

Laps

So, I went swimming at the Community Center this morning. I went earlier this week and decided to go back today. I only swam a 500 (20 lengths of the pool)...and that was a stretch. In my glory swim team days, I could easily knock out 3000-5000 yds a workout. Those days are gone. However, in time I hope to slowly ease back into at least maybe 2000 yards. The facility is very nice and I like doing it first thing in the morning because it starts my day off right. Swimming is great because I get a full body workout without putting too much strain on my joints. :-)

Now, Noah and I are headed to the RVC office to pray for our friend Dan Griffen's older brother who has a potentially cancerous tumor (please pray for him!) and then off to meet my friend Jen at Olive Garden for a silent lunch (signing only).

'Already' but 'not yet'

I am an 'already but not yet' person. I am an 'already' because I have given my life to Christ, I am a new creation, Christ lives in me. I have experienced freedom in my life from the past. I have felt joy that can only be found through a relationship with Jesus. But I am also a 'not yet'. I still struggle with sin. I don't have it all together...believe me. I make more mistakes than I can count. I say the wrong thing and do the wrong thing. I have the ability to hurt others feelings. I am tempted to gossip and/or be angry with people because they don't do what I want. I am a 'not yet'. I hate that I am a 'not yet'...because that means that I don't have it all together. According to Derek Morphew, author of Breakthrough, "We are glorious contradictions." I am encouraged by Paul, one of God's most faithful servants, when he says:

When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being, I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin....What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-through Jesus Christ our Lord! (Romans 7:22-25 NIV)

Even Paul, who endured both physical and emotional torments because he loved God so much dealt with the struggle of sin. When I first started writing this, I felt the hopelessness of the 'not yet'. I don't want to dwell in that arena. After reading Paul's agonized accounting...I realize that God rescues us from that pit. He helps us to avoid temptation. He forgives us when we fail...and that we must exist in a realistic outlook. Not a defeatist (we are sinners so therefore until Christ comes we are always going to fail) or even too triumphal because we can live in a spiritual bubble and/or become arrogant that can hurt the name of Jesus. Rather, says the author, it is better to be realistic. "God always leads us in triumph, yet our lives seem like one long battle. As we look within ourselves we sometimes feel victorious, joyful, and free, yet those moments are quickly replaced by feelings of great weakness, fear, and 'groaning' from which we long to escape."

Morphew also writes, "The closer we get to God and the more we experience the in-breaking of the kingdom, the more disturbed we become by the 'not yet' within us. In a strange, contradictory way the more we get from God the more we groan." I can definitely relate.

Closure: More deep thoughts about the kingdom...not professing that I truly understand, but I am learning a lot and am trying to transition from allowing the enemy to make me feel defeated when I screw up, to living realistically...realizing that God is in me, I have the ability to do many good things. But also realizing that I am still going to sin, and although there are consequences, there is also grace.

Lord, forgive me for the mistakes I have made. Help me to do better in the future. Keep breaking through in my life and help me to continue to seek you even when I fail. Don't give up on me Lord.

Birthdays, scrapbooking, and muffins

The last two days have been busy, but good. Dave's mom, aunt, and uncle came for a visit yesterday afternoon. Aunt Diane and Uncle Bill hadn't seen Noah since Thanksgiving...He's grown a little since then. It was a nice visit and we got to celebrate Diane's birthday, which is today. Happy Birthday Diane!

Later that night, I went to Sarah's to crop/scrapbook. I know I laugh about this, but I am clearly not a scrapbooker. When gifts and talents were being handed out...I missed the creative scrapbooking one. I'm OK with this. I am interested in many things, but not excessively great at any one thing. Scrapbooking may just not be my bag. Seriously, when I finished, it looked like a 5th grader had done it (and I am being generous here). Then I started looking at my creative friends, and I thought...Gee, I wonder what I could pay them to finish this for me? Anyway, the night was still very pleasant with good "girl" talk and a chance to have some adult time without Noah. Dave was so great about that last night. When I came home, he even rubbed my sore neck...not once...but twice. Yea for great husbands!

This morning, I baked 4 dozen blueberry muffins with the intent to hand some out to the neighbors (before we eat them all...that would be bad). Summer came over and we worked on invitations for Heather's shower and Dave made us his specialty homemade pizza (I may never eat frozen again). It was so good.

I am still trying to read through "Breakthrough" by Derek Morphew for my meeting with Tiffany S. This week, I feel as though I have ADD. Everytime I sit down to read it, I start and my mind is off thinking about a million other things...mostly spiritual thoughts at this point...but not really pertaining to the book or helping me understand what I am reading. I am going to have to tackle it again tonight. Phew...gotta persevere.

So, that's me...in a nutshell.

Blueberry Picking

This morning, Dave, Noah, and I went blueberry picking. It was a lot of fun...and hot. Noah helped by putting them in the bucket. Right towards the end he got the concept of picking them off the bush...and even ate a few. It's this nice little place just past Ross Park. I am toying with going back on Thu. (they are only open Tue, Thu, and Sat. mornings). I am also anxious to start making blueberry muffins soon. :-) Dave is planning on making a blueberry cheesecake. We have blueberries coming out of our ears...but it was so cheap to go pick them! $1.25/lb. Not bad at all considering what you pay in the grocery store these days. All in all, it was a great way to spend a Tuesday morning!

Faith Community Center

Faith Baptist Church, which is right around the corner from me, just opened up a Community Center for...the community. It is awesome! Anyone can access it. They have a swimming pool, exercise room, and an above the gym lap thingie. The pool has two sides...one is zero depth and has stuff for the kiddos. The other side is a lap pool (which I am really excited for!). The membership for Dave and I together is only $30/mo. Not bad at all. We toured it today and everyone is so nice and welcoming. YEA!!!! Exercise...here I come.

Cookout

Tiffany, Ike, Jon, Misha, Katie, Adam, Halie, and Calvin all came over to cookout after church today. I love these guys. It was a lot of fun. Thanks to Ike and Adam for cooking on the grill (Dave had to work). It was great to see the college students again. I miss them. Afterwards, there was some race car watching and lounging around before they headed home. I love that our house can be used as a hang out. Good times.

Great Saturday

This morning, Dave and I opted against the Hiking Trip (Sorry Patrick and Ann!) due to Dave's work schedule the rest of the weekend. We decided to maybe try to pick some blueberries and keep Noah sort of on schedule. We woke up to a rainy morning, which we can't complain about since it is MUCH needed as my brown grass can attest. We hit a few garage sales on the way, then decided that the rain was too much to make blueberry picking fun. We scratched that and came home. After getting home, we found tentative closure with the family issue fron yesterday. We also ate our picnic (that was intentioned for Happy Hollow Park) on a blanket in our living room. It was a lot of fun to be different. However, "Ask this Old House" was on, and both Dave and Noah had "check out" moments where manland beckoned. It was rather amusing. Afterwards, we decided to take a nice family nap. Two blessed hours later we woke up and watched "Miss Potter", which is a cute similar reminder to "Finding Neverland". We enjoyed it. The day has been nothing what we anticipated, but everything we needed. Dave and I have enjoyed just being together and I have enjoyed his help in corralling our very mischievous son. The rain seems to bring out extra helpings of mischief.

We then made a homemade pizza. By we, I mean mostly Dave, while I folded and put away laundry. Then Dave and Noah tried dodging rain drops to go on a short bike ride...short was the operative word. We are now just relaxing. Dave is reading a magazine, Noah is running around (he doesn't really "relax") and I am getting ready to print off Sunday School stuff for tomorrow.

It's been a decidedly great Saturday...and I couldn't have asked for better.

Hard Day/Good Evening

It has been somewhat of a hard day today. It's that time of the month. That in itself is depressing. I dealt with a very hard situation with a family member who has the potential to cause great harm to my family...and in setting appropriate boundaries, it became messy...but necessary to protect my family...especially my son. The after effects came in the mail today in the form of a hurtful barb (aimed at me) embedded in a letter to Noah. As a mom, I am determined that Noah not feel the pain that I have from this person...and I will do anything in my power to protect him from that kind of pain. Though sometimes, the cost is considerable. Anyway, the whole experience left me vulnerable and depressed.

Until Dave came home. He brought me Chik-fil-A to help cheer me up (God help me for being a comfort eater). He, Noah, and I took a nice long walk where we were just able to talk and connect. When we got home, Noah got to play in the pool...thus the picture. When I see such joy from my son, I know that its all worth it. Everything...even the hardships. That smile is a reminder of all that God has blessed me with. So, the evening has really picked up. I think soon we are going to have more friends stop by.

God, thank you for restoring my joy and giving me an amazing family. Protect Noah, Jesus, even when I can't.

Summer Friends

Really nothing new and exciting to report. I spent the day yesterday with Halie and we watched an Affair to Remember. We are trying to culture ourselves by watching movies that are considered classics. It was a good movie. Then we all played in Noah's pool for a little while. In the evening, Jonelly came over to watch Alias Season 5 on DVD and William came over to meet with Dave. Later, Dave took Noah out on his first ride in the "new" bike trailer that I got a good deal on at a garage sale. His friend Tyson stopped by and they both got to take a spin. Meanwhile, Tyson's mom, and my friend, Dana hung out with Jonell and I.

I love summer evenings where friends come and go!

This morning, Dave helped out at home....and is now off playing frisbee golf with Dan. I managed to vacuum and steam clean the carpets. There is something to be said for cleaning carpets...It makes me feel so, well, clean.

Now I'm looking forward to a relaxing afternoon...after I put the kid down for a much needed nap.

Awesome Gift!

Remember the red/yellow car from a previous post? The one that Noah wouldn't get out of because he loved it so much? When I was at Sarah's yesterday we were talking about his newfound love (as he is sitting in Raya's car and "driving"). I mentioned that if she ever saw one at a garage sale or anything to let me know.

Well, last night on her walk, she apparently ran into someone who had one in her garage. (Don't know the details). Anyway, she told the woman that if she was ever going to sell it, to let her know. The woman just GAVE it to her! So Sarah walked home with a stroller and pushing this red/yellow car for Noah. And now, as soon as we go pick it up, Noah will have a "new" red car to play in. Thanks so much Sarah for asking! Thanks too to the woman who so generously gave it to her!

Happy Father's Day

I love my husband....for many reason's really. Beyond being handsome, kind, loving Jesus, and his freaky ability to read me like a book...He is also a really great dad. Watching him with Noah gives me so much joy...and Noah loves his daddy. He lights up whenever Dave comes home and loves playing with him. He is the master of loving discipline. He works hard so that I don't have to get a job outside of raising Noah. Even then, he still manages to spend a good part of his week with his family. Beyond that, he helps out with the parenting and doesn't rely on me alone to do everything. Because of that he has become really in-tune to Noah's needs...and does not have to rely on me to know his schedule or how/what to do with him. He is an involved dad...and Noah is going to benefit from that greatly. I am so very fortunate that I married such a wonderful man (and that his parents raised him that way) and thankful that Noah too is a part of his legacy. Here's to a wonderful husband and dad on Father's Day. I love you honey!

Crisis Averted

Thanks to my great neighbor, Kandi, who did some smooth talking...I have decided to post-pone the Potluck in the Park to the early fall (as opposed to the July 14 date that was looming rather fast). This is brilliant for many reasons...1) my mental sanity 2) It can be mentioned in the newsletter for our neighborhood 3) more time and energy to plan 4) cooler weather and less people vacationing.

Phew! I feel a little better now (but still ashamed that I missed the meeting last night).

Thank you Jesus for friends who talk sense into us!

Dolt!!

I just realized that I missed a very important meeting for our homeowner's last night...to plan a potluck in the park for our neighborhood. I set it up, I sent out the emails, I made sure that everything was put in place...and then completely forgot. Many people emailed and said that they would not be able to make it. However, there was a potential for 3 families to maybe attend....and I blew it. The worst part was, I needed their help to get this thing going. I cannot (and will not) single-handedly tackle another community "event". I got conned into doing the Easter Egg Hunt this year...and without the help of 2 of my neighbors...would not have succeeded. Part of me wants to chuck the whole idea...but since I have now put it in the brains of these few families, I feel that it is expected to happen. How it is going to happen with me manning the sails is questionable. (Me mentally kicking myself over and over and over). Dolt! Anyway, I'm off to try and create a flyer to take to Staples...then off to buy materials for Sunday school, meanwhile making dinner and preparing for my in-laws to come for a visit. (Me...not panicking...)

Purging

Dave and I have just spent the morning purging the guest bedroom. We had accumlated so much stuff and just shoved things there. Much of it was junk that we just didn't need to hold onto anymore. The sense of relief and "ahhh" feeling that came over me when I pulled the garbage bags out to the garage was great. We drove 4 bags worth of stuff to Goodwill and it was liberating...really.


It made me start thinking about the junk that we have inside and have not been willing to let go of. Sin, past hurts, "dead" weight. I am sure that the relief that I felt getting rid of tangible junk is nothing compared to the freedom and relief that comes when we rid our souls of the "junk" that weighs down our lives.

Lord, help us to purge ourselves of the sin and the hurts of the past that hold us back from being all that you would have us to be. Help us to be free from those things so that we can fully experience the good things that you have for us.

Whirlwind Trip

Dave and I decided spur of the moment to head home to our parent's house. Dave got a new pair of clippers in order to shave down his parent's dog...Maggie was in desperate need of a cut. She lost a lot of hair and I bet she feels much cooler in this hot weather!

Outdoor Fun

Noah and I went to our neighbor's house on Tuesday to play. They have a little pool and other toys. We got the boys all greased up with sunscreen and then released them to to the pool...but instead of heading to the pool my son sees those red/yellow cars and beelines to it like an ant to a picnic. He then refused to leave that car almost the entire time we were there. Fortunately, his friend, Tyson, adapted and chose to push him around in it for awhile. Now that's a good friend!

The Ultimate Father

Parenting has given me a deeper glimpse into the character of God:

1) Discipline is HARD...but necessary. I don't love giving Noah consequences for his actions...but I know that in the long run that he will be better for it. I want him to grow up doing the right thing and staying away from danger. Isn't that how God loves us? Sometimes we have consequences for the sins in our life...I know that when I am deeply humbled about my sin...I change...but often not until that point.

2) God wants good things for us. Dave and I hit the garage sales last weekend and ended up with 3 new toys for Noah. We struggle with buying things for ourselves at times, but never blink when it comes to blessing our kid. We love doing nice things for him and making him smile. I think that is how God views us...He wants to give us good things...He enjoys blessing us and making us smile.

3) God's love knows no bounds. I would do anything for my kid...I can honestly say...I would give my life for him. I love him that much. Even when I am frustrated with him...I love him. And if my love, which is imperfect, is that strong...I can't even imagine the Father's love for us.

Doing what is best, but not always cool or popular for our kids is always going to be an uphill battle...at least for me. However, I strongly believe that part of my ministry right now is raising a kid to love Jesus and to understand the kingdom and how he fits into it. We are a part of the body...and as part, we get to experience the fruitful blessings that God has for us, as well as the refining process of a Father who really DOES know what is best.

Lord, thank you for being the ultimate Father...and for continually revealing your character so that we can see you more clearly.

Good Friends

We just got back from spending the afternoon/evening with our good friends Rocky and Abby. We had such a great time hanging out, going for a walk, and eating way too much food! In a lot of ways I feel as though we are kindred spirits...we are very alike in many ways...but different too. It's nice to have friends that you can just "do life" with...without all the fuss.

Now we are home...Noah is asleep and I have a house that is beckoning to be picked up (at the very least). It's a beautiful night and the birds and frogs are at it outside. I love this time of year!

Lord, thanks for great friends and fellowship...thank you too for this weather and all the opportunities it brings!

Garage Sale King

I have in the past been dubbed the garage sale queen. However I think I need to step down and hand the crown over to my husband. We recently got rid of our old bouncy seat (which was on its way out the door) and decided to look for a new one this year at garage sales for whenever baby #2 comes along. I have had my eye on a baby papasan for awhile now...in the store they are over $50...and we weren't seeing them at garage sales for under $35. We have passed by quite a few bouncers that we just didn't like or were too expensive for what it was.

Anyway, on his way home from work this morning, Dave stopped off at a garage sale and found a working, great condition, papasan for $10! Yep...my hats off to him for a great find. This is why I love garage sales people...Every once in awhile...you hit treasure!

Life with a one-year old

Noah is walking now...well running actually...and has found that the world is a pretty neat place to explore. He is into EVERYTHING...I have found my shoes in the bathtub, Elmo in another bathroom, coasters heaven knows where. If we don't keep the toilet seat down we hear the "swish swish" of little hands playing. He also has a one-year old attention span...He has a toy and is walking with it...then sees another object and thinks "ooh...shiny" drops previous toy and picks up new one. By toy, I mean anything that is probably not generally thought of as a toy...namely...remotes, cell phones, mommy books, shoes, drinks, camera cases...you name it...Noah loves it. As a parent...I love that he is seeking out the world and figuring things out...I really do...But sometimes, I would just like to be able to find both sets of shoes. :-)

Even If...

In thinking of a title for this blog...I keep thinking of some verses in Daniel...and that can pretty much sum up my spiriual thoughts this past year. Daniel 3 talks about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (lovingly, Rack, Shack, and Benny) and their refusal to worship a false idol. The consequences for such an action were to be thrown into a blazing furnace. When pressed they replied,

"the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." (Daniel 3:17-18 NIV)

I think on that often...if put in a situation that requires great faith...would I be able to say, like Rack, Shack, and Benny...My God is able to save me from (fill in the appropriate trial), but even if He doesn't...I still choose to follow and serve Him.

Lord, help me to have that kind of faith...that, when met with resistance and trials, I could stand firm and trust in You.