Sunday, May 4, 2008

Boob Debate-Breastfeeding issues

I am back to being a breastfeeding mom. It's funny, when I look at other mom's nursing, I am not exactly the most comfortable around them because I KNOW what they are doing...which is the most natural thing in the world right? Sure. Unfortunately, it's not the most socially acceptable thing. Here's my dilemma. As stated, I am nursing Callie. I enjoy this bonding that I have with my daughter (and it saves us a boat-load of money on formula).

With Noah, I always banished myself away from the public eye to nurse (dressing rooms, separate bedrooms, leaving the sanctuary, etc.). Perhaps my filter has been completely drained now that I have two, but I have not "left" places as often to nurse. Rather, I cover myself with a neatly designed "hooter hider" as my friend likes to call it and discretly nurse. Of course, people still know what I am doing...I mean obviously.

My dilemma is that I don't really want to be banished anymore, but I'm also not exactly the most comfortable nursing in public either. I hate missing any of the action (lifegroup discussions, sermons, worship, time with friends when company is over). Should I have to? I know that I can be weirded out by the whole "boob" issue, so out of respect for others I sometimes leave so that it's not weird for them. Is sitting in the back of church enough or should I leave completely until I am done? We had people over the other night (guys and girls). I still sat in the living room, covered, and nursed. Does this weird people out? I'm genuinely curious. And if so, whose issue is it? Mine? Theirs?

Dave and I watch Bones on television. This last episode was of Booth and Brennan watching a baby. The maternally (and socially) challenged Brennan starts a dialogue with Booth (the FBI agent...and a man) about breastfeeding. He is completely not comfortable with the topic, which is hard for Brennan to understand. She asks him if it's the word "breast" that is so discomforting and asked if "teet" would be easier to discuss. Booth responds, "I do not want to talk teets with you!". Amusing? Yes...especially to me who nurses. But it brings up the point that not everyone is comfortable with this topic.

There is also the mom that got banished from the plane for breastfeeding. OK, I definitely have an opinion on this one: She had no where else to go, was covered, and decided to spare the plane a squalling infant by nursing her. I commend her. It still points to the very big issue of people who are uncomfortable around nursing moms.

So, I guess I'm curious as to other's thoughts. Where is the best place for a nursing mom to nurse? Should she remove herself for others comfort? Or even her own?

9 comments:

Ann said...

I BF'ed both H & H. The only place I left to do it was the table :) I skipped the blanket over the head--Henry wouldn't eat with one on, and with Harmony I didn't have time to mess with it. My attitude is "that's what God made them for" and if someone got a glimpse, it was their fault for looking...and they probably saw less than a lot of magazine ads show. I also thought that if I wouldn't eat in a bathroom, my baby shouldn't have to either. So I'd say feed Callie when she's hungry, and as long as she's not distracted by the company (Henry would pull off and look around, shooting milk all over the place), stay where you are :)

Kelsey said...

I think that as long as you are covered, it's completely appropriate. I never feel uncomfortable around women who breastfeed...as evidenced by me hammering you with personal questions about it at LG! But if anyone is uncomfortable, I think it's their issue. But I do think it would be awkward in mixed company if you weren't covered.

I am curious--how do you banish someone from a plane? I assume they didn't kick her out in midair!

The Rockstar said...

It is no secret that I am basically honest to a fault...

I think you should be covered. I do not want to see your boob. I do not know anyone other than Dave that does. There are laws about public displays of this sort of thing. Breastfeed or not... You cannot just go flashing people. Just cover it up! :)

For one that is not "comfortable" around this sort of thing, I am actually fine when it is covered up.

Oh, that lady that was breast feeding the twins at River's party. I understand they are hungry, but... I saw the boob. I did not know she was in the room breastfeeding. She should have covered up. Really...

Ann said...

Just an addendum--just because I didn't have a blanket over H, that didn't mean I wasn't covered. Between my shirt and the baby, there wasn't anything exposed...

Laura said...

amen to what ann says...God created these for our little ones...and it's an amazing awesome thing. to those that don't agree or don't like it, they should just look the other way.
i am very open about nursing around other women...but i go somewhere else if there's other men. (other than my family....they just are all used to it by now...i do cover up well) i do feel like i miss out on things, so i try to schedule feedings around things happening. we're blessed at our church that we have a tv in our nursery that we can watch the sermon happening while in nursery.

Kim said...

I think what I meant was around guys. At church, there is a mix of guys/girls (clearly). I don't mind nursing around other women...it's the men. Do I miss the sermon or lifegroup discussions because there are guys there or just nurse/cover-up?

mjvan said...

I have to admit that I left the room when guys were present other than family. I never could quite get covered up as well I would want to in front of other men. I tried nursing in the back at church one time and I felt like everyone could hear Kinley sucking. Could you do it right before group?

Amanda said...

Well, I'm usually fine with it as long as everything's covered up. The one time I was uncomfortable was when the lady was brest feeding a two-year-old. And I think I was uncomfortable for other reasons...

Sally Parmenter said...

As a nursing mom, still nursing my 10 1/2 month old, I have to say...with Anna I nursed in more public places than with David. She was easier to snuggle up and cover up. David is crazy man looking everywhere and on & off. So, I say, around women, nurse away. Around men...cover up for sure. I probably would go to another room. :) Here's an idea for your Lifegroup-could you turn a chair backwards? So you were still in the room, but not "out in the open". Then you could still hear everything and even throw in your comments:) Enjoy your precious little one!