When it all hits the fan...

Our morning started with a phone call letting us know that Dave's grandma had passed away over the night. It's not completely unexpected, but it it still sad. What's worse, is that we were not able to see her before she passed. Circumstances worked against us and it just didn't happen. We found out the visitation and funeral are on Tuesday and Wednesday respectivelly. Unfortunately, these are the only 2 days that Dave is working this week. He was able to get things switched around thogh.

Meanwhile, after church, Dave took Noah home to nap while I had a farewell lunch with a friend who is moving to Denver. Noah napped the whole time I was gone. When I got home, Dave left to play frisbee golf and I decided to try and taken the kids to the mall to get Father's Day presents since I had my nifty new stroller. Well, that was a bad move on my part. When will I learn? Suffice it to say, Noah was in time out in Kohls while women stared at me with disapproval. The minute I had Noah calmed down, had him apologize and got him situated, Callie let loose with all she was worth. I realized that she had soaked through her outfit and all my spares were...in the van. I was going to buy her an outfit there anyway because I had exchanged one she had outgrew before she could wear it. Until then though, she rode around in just her diaper wailing. (I eventually did dress her as she wailed outside of Kohls)

Noah refused to ride in his new stroller as we walked the length of the mall to get to Penneys. I just kept walking and he followed. Although I did get many funny looks from parents. On any other day, I wish I could say that I knew EXACTLY what to do to get my kid to obey and hop in that stroller and that we were on our merry way. Some days, I CAN wave that magic mom wand and make it happen. Other days, like today, my wand has gone missing...and along with it...my patience.

When we got to Penneys, both children started screaming at the top of their lungs. There was a whole line of people waiting to check out that all took time to stare at the Broadway Musical that was unfolding before their eyes. I felt my resolve completely shatter. I laid my head against a post and just took a deep breath, picked Callie up, told Noah to get back into the stroller (for the 48th time) and proceeded to the checkout. While waiting, Noah picked up my wallet and dropped it, scattering literally everything I had in there (which is a lot of crap) all over the floor.

Then, in my lowest moment, a kind voice says to her daughter, "Let's help this lady pick up her wallet." She bends down and quickly helps me gather all my things, picks up the wallet and hands it to me. In the most knowing and sympathetic voice she quietly says, "It's hard, isn't it?". "Yes" I reply as I (no joke) start crying. For some reason, this woman's compassion was my undoing and I just lost it in the middle of JC Penneys. More women started looking at me as I have tears running down my face. I am mortified that I have been reduced to tears. Then, Noah gets off the stroller AGAIN and I have to ask him for the 49th, 50th, 51st, and 52nd time to get back on the stroller.

God must have known I couldnt' handle much more. I got a phone call from my sister-in-law, Laura, who just listened as I verbally threw up on her the events of the last 20 minutes. Then, I ran into my friend Ann and her two kids who were leisurely walking the mall. I walked up to her about ready to cry again at the sight of seeing a friendly face. She walked me to where our car was parked. It was just what I needed to calm down. Noah of course, was behaving at that time.

At the end of the day however, I still come to two conclusions: Parenting is NOT easy. I love my kids and they are worth it all.